"Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love." ~George Eliot
First of all, with this post I'll be breaking the surprisingly symmetric normal distribution of posts and nominally and locally making the job of central limit theorem (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_limit_theorem) a bit harder.
This is going to be all emotional and sulky probably so forgive me for that; I'm only human :) This should probably have gone in to all those dusty word files piled up in my writing folder; whose contents would be like myself cut open and put open on a table for inspection. Alas it is here because this feels more real, because I feel heard :) (Somewhat ironic considering the non-existent audience :D).
Goodbyes are one of the topics that we as humans have dreaded and valued with almost equal feeling. It was when I googled 'Goodbyes' that I saw of few of the most thoughtful quotes I have ever read together in a single page.
Goodbyes have always been hard for me and I was always a bit reluctant to admit this to myself or anyone else for that matter, for a long time. I remember watching with slight tears in my eyes, mom and dad walking away after getting me to my grandparents home during summer vacation. I knew I would see them again, I loved staying with my grandparents, I knew I would have a great time with my sis and bro, still I was sad. It didn't last much then because then my world as every other fortunate kid's did not have a thing such as permanent good byes. No one ever died or went away.
But they became harder and harder as I grew up and got into my teens. The easier ones are those which you say to your family where you have the assurance that unless you're on the really really bad side of the randomness of the universe; you'll see them again and they won't forget you.
Next comes the goodbyes you never get to say, the conversations that you're sure in your inexperience in life that won't break off ever. I still remember one of my closest friends ever promising to call me back a week after she joined her new college. I did not have her number, neither did I get that call. Now after many years I'm her friend on Facebook, but we have not even exchanged a single message in years. Another one of my close friends recently disappeared from every network and is untraceable. Did these relationships deserve to be broken up ? I know that question doesn't make much sense in the grand context of life where a single bond is peanuts to chaos in which anything is possible. But to me and to every other person who experience this, this question is real, valid and burning a hole somewhere in us. Surprisingly somewhere in these there has been a bit of hope too, like a pleasant call from a long-unspoken buddy once in a while.
Third comes the most poignant. meaningful and heartbreaking class of goodbyes. The ones you start dreading months before. The ones where you know that probability is against you ever meeting in the ever growing population and is decaying at a precipitous rate every minute ( another argument for population control :) ). This is where the most colorful of memories are created, where every detail of that meal, conversation or drive stays in your mind, consistently dodging all attempts to erase it. What do you say at these goodbyes ? Is there anything to say ? I don't know, but I think I'll find out soon :) I have a feeling that these might perhaps be the moments that define us as humans, as beings who feel love,compassion,despair,hate and jealousy.
'Now is there any solution for this ?' anyone who invested their time reading so far might ask.Short answer as we know is No. It's not possible and life is as it is. It will bring around as many surprises as it has taken away for most of us who fall within the reasonable limits of its distribution of happiness. There is one thing you can do though. Don't let the people who matter to you that much leave permanently. Make them a part of your life in someway, and there is always a way. But alas all of us are stupid in a sense and don't realize what we're letting go while we are at it. The Eureka moment comes shortly thereafter and I sincerely hope that for everyone, it won't be in the credits after the ending :)
This is going to be all emotional and sulky probably so forgive me for that; I'm only human :) This should probably have gone in to all those dusty word files piled up in my writing folder; whose contents would be like myself cut open and put open on a table for inspection. Alas it is here because this feels more real, because I feel heard :) (Somewhat ironic considering the non-existent audience :D).
Goodbyes are one of the topics that we as humans have dreaded and valued with almost equal feeling. It was when I googled 'Goodbyes' that I saw of few of the most thoughtful quotes I have ever read together in a single page.
Goodbyes have always been hard for me and I was always a bit reluctant to admit this to myself or anyone else for that matter, for a long time. I remember watching with slight tears in my eyes, mom and dad walking away after getting me to my grandparents home during summer vacation. I knew I would see them again, I loved staying with my grandparents, I knew I would have a great time with my sis and bro, still I was sad. It didn't last much then because then my world as every other fortunate kid's did not have a thing such as permanent good byes. No one ever died or went away.
But they became harder and harder as I grew up and got into my teens. The easier ones are those which you say to your family where you have the assurance that unless you're on the really really bad side of the randomness of the universe; you'll see them again and they won't forget you.
Next comes the goodbyes you never get to say, the conversations that you're sure in your inexperience in life that won't break off ever. I still remember one of my closest friends ever promising to call me back a week after she joined her new college. I did not have her number, neither did I get that call. Now after many years I'm her friend on Facebook, but we have not even exchanged a single message in years. Another one of my close friends recently disappeared from every network and is untraceable. Did these relationships deserve to be broken up ? I know that question doesn't make much sense in the grand context of life where a single bond is peanuts to chaos in which anything is possible. But to me and to every other person who experience this, this question is real, valid and burning a hole somewhere in us. Surprisingly somewhere in these there has been a bit of hope too, like a pleasant call from a long-unspoken buddy once in a while.
Third comes the most poignant. meaningful and heartbreaking class of goodbyes. The ones you start dreading months before. The ones where you know that probability is against you ever meeting in the ever growing population and is decaying at a precipitous rate every minute ( another argument for population control :) ). This is where the most colorful of memories are created, where every detail of that meal, conversation or drive stays in your mind, consistently dodging all attempts to erase it. What do you say at these goodbyes ? Is there anything to say ? I don't know, but I think I'll find out soon :) I have a feeling that these might perhaps be the moments that define us as humans, as beings who feel love,compassion,despair,hate and jealousy.
'Now is there any solution for this ?' anyone who invested their time reading so far might ask.Short answer as we know is No. It's not possible and life is as it is. It will bring around as many surprises as it has taken away for most of us who fall within the reasonable limits of its distribution of happiness. There is one thing you can do though. Don't let the people who matter to you that much leave permanently. Make them a part of your life in someway, and there is always a way. But alas all of us are stupid in a sense and don't realize what we're letting go while we are at it. The Eureka moment comes shortly thereafter and I sincerely hope that for everyone, it won't be in the credits after the ending :)
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